


Brag cause you're the one that they fuss about

by zaynandlouis



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Airplane Sex, Alternate Universe - Crack, Barebacking, Crack, Dom!Zayn, Dom/sub, Drunk Sex, Here we go, Homophobic Language, Humiliation, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Riding, Sub!Louis, This is completely self indulgent, Watersports, Wetting, basically they join the mile high club, toilet sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-12
Updated: 2014-06-12
Packaged: 2018-02-04 08:32:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1772554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zaynandlouis/pseuds/zaynandlouis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>louis puts on his best puppy dog face. “i want to be official. like.. instagram official.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Brag cause you're the one that they fuss about

**Author's Note:**

> wiz and amber have been my otp since middle school and this is (very) loosely based off their relationship. inspired by this quote from wiz about amber, “We have small arguments; they last like 20 minutes because we can’t stay mad at each other." and zayn's wiz khalifa hair phase. 
> 
> (more like zayn is based off wiz, and louis is written in amber's role but isn't supposed to reflect her personality).
> 
>    
> ~ i don't directly address it but i romanticize louis' bipolar-ism so if that's going to trigger you or anything pls don't read.

**lisaloveee3** stop making zayn gay  
gaylonj96 zayns gay for this  
deantomp ZAYNS A FUCKING FAGGOT?  
krazykim @deantomp no  
meanygoth owwwwwww  
llllevi fags  
freddyfuck why zayn hang out with this fag  
chadbaseball12 wtf  
**harrystyles** beef

louis starts laughing because he knows harry means he’s got beef with zayn, but all he can think is that harry was trying to order food and typed it in the wrong place by accident. apparently a breakup with louis can really make you pack on the pounds.

louis gets out of bed, leaving his phone to walk into the hotel’s bathroom. zayn’s showering, thankfully, because louis really has to take a piss. 

“harry says he’s got beef with you,” louis says loud enough for zayn to hear him over the water. he’s not wearing clothes, so he lifts the seat and goes about relieving himself.

“what?” zayn pulls the shower curtain out of the way so he can poke his head out, “did you post another selfie with me naked in the background?” 

“you had a _sheet_ on,” louis gives a dramatic sigh and a eye roll even though zayn can’t see it.

“louis,” zayn warns. he’s back to showering now, so he can’t see louis walking closer to it. zayn had jumped straight in the shower when he woke up, judging by the toilet seat still being down when louis came in. that meant he hadn’t had his morning piss.

“anyways, don’t really give a fuck if harry’s got beef. what he want to do? fight me for you? pathetic.” 

louis steps into the shower and zayn turns around to smirk at him.  “all mine now."

“yeah? wanna mark your territory?” louis asks, batting his eyelashes and running his hand up zayn’s dick to cup his balls.

 

* * *

  
zayn rolls off louis and lays on his back beside him.

once louis catches his breath he asks, “what time do we have to leave for the airport?” 

“uhh, one, i think,” zayn replies casually.

“ONE? it’s already noon!” louis sits up, looking at zayn like he just killed his mother. actually, if zayn killed his mother he probably wouldn’t be as mad as he looks right now. 

zayn shrugs. “and? we have a whole hour to pack.”

“i need to shower! i have your piss all over me!” louis struggles to untangle his legs from the sheets, and waddles over to his suitcase to get his toothbrush.

“hey! that was _your_ idea,” zayn says defensively, propping his head on his elbow.

“fuck you, zayn. can’t believe you didn’t tell me how early we had to leave. see if i ever let you pee on me again!” before zayn can say anything in his defense, louis storms off into the bathroom. “and there’s piss all over the sheets, too,” louis adds before he slams the door shut. 

zayn lets his head fall back against the pillow. “shit.”  
 

* * *

  
“t-this, god, this doesn’t get you off the hook,” louis grunts, bouncing as much as he can in the cramped space of the lavatory. 

“no, but it gets you off,” zayn laughs as leans back in his seat, that happens to be on the toilet. he lets his head fall back against the wall and lets out a deep breath. 

louis starts to make these little whimpering noises with every bounce and zayn has to bury his face in his neck to hold back a groan. 

louis’ bouncing becomes sloppy and desperate, his whimpers high pitched, and soon he’s shooting his load all over zayn’s chest and zayn’s fucking him through his orgasm, following close behind with his own. 

“um, s-sir, are you almost finished with the lavatory? there are several others who need to use it,” comes a timid, feminine voice from the other side of the lavatory’s door.

 

* * *

 

louis drops himself down in zayn’s lap. “zayynnnyyy pooo,” he whines into zayn’s ear, nipping at the lobe and swirling his tongue around the small crystal stud there before continuing, “why won’t you post pictures of me on your instagram?” 

“why would i?” zayn asks, never looking away from the tv.

louis tugs on the stud with his teeth. he pulls away to pout and give his boyfriend the evil eye. 

“wot?” zayn winces, finally muting the tv and looking at louis. 

louis puts on his best puppy dog face. “i want to be official. like.. _instagram_ official.” 

zayn rolls his eyes and sighs heavily. 

“fine,” he throws his phone in louis’ lap, “pick out one of our selfies and i’ll post it. and don’t make pick one where either of us are naked.” louis smiles and kisses zayn’s cheek.

“thank you,” he unlocks zayn’s phone and starts looking through his pictures. 

“mhm..” zayn holds back a smile and unmutes the tv. 

it only takes louis a few minutes to pick out a picture. “this one!” he decides, turning the phone around to show zayn. it’s a picture zayn took a couple weeks ago of them in a position much like their current one. louis in zayn’s lap, with zayn’s arm around him. thankfully, both were fully clothed, but you could tell there was intimacy. 

“okay, yeah,” zayn agrees. he takes his phone back and ignores louis smiling down at him while he crops it for instagram. he types out some heart emojis for the caption, and adds one heart eye emoji when he feels louis start to bounce excitedly. 

as soon as he posts it louis is pulling his face up for a kiss.

after a few minutes, and some very nice tongue sucking, louis pulls back and stands up, taking zayn’s hand. 

he starts walking backward, pulling zayn towards the bedroom.”you’re getting rode so good for this.” 

 

* * *

 

“so, zayn,” the interviewer smirks at him, “i think you know what we just _have_ to ask about.” 

zayn decides to play innocent. it’s not like he’s never been asked about louis before, but this time it was like. official. instagram official.

“what’s that?”

“you and this _louis guy_. he’s been instagramming some pretty suggestive photos of you two for a while, and yesterday you posted one of your own. are you two together?” 

zayn messes with the sleeves of his shirt before answering, and he’s glad this is a radio interview, so no one can see his nervous twitch. “yeah, yeah. we uh, yeah.” 

the interviewer’s smirk grows and she lets out a little giggle. “so you two are together?” she asks again, one of her eyebrows raised. 

“yeah. we have a thing,” zayn nods, giving her a small smile.

she smiles into her mic. “well, there you have it ladies and gentlemen, zayn malik; taken.” 

 

* * *

 

zayn lets out a sigh, hearing louis barging into the bathroom and a loud “fuck you, zayn!” being yelled towards the shower he stands in. 

“what did i d-” he starts, only to be cut off by louis. 

“a thing?? a _thing_! you called me a thing! you come out and you can’t even call me your boyfriend?” 

“i called what we have a thing,” zayn corrects. he can see louis’ silhouette through the shower door, and he can tell he’s got his hand on his hip. he sighs again. 

“i’m sorry, have i been misunderstanding this arrangement? do we not have a relationship?” louis is trying to sound sarcastic, but it comes out more hurt. 

“a thing can be a relationship, lou,” zayn shuts off the shower. he can’t shower _and_ deal with louis’ hysterics. he’s not that good at multi-tasking.

“but! but.. it sounded like you weren’t proud of me,” louis follows zayn around the bathroom, watching him step out of the shower and get a towel. “aren’t you proud of me?” louis’ voice has gone high and he’s fidgeting with his hands nervously.

zayn sighs and takes louis’ hands in his. “baby, i’m never ashamed of you. i’m just not good at public displays of affection. you know that,” he comforts, bringing louis into his chest. 

louis sniffs, a little dramatically, before answering. “i know.. sorry i yelled at you.” 

zayn laughs softly, “it’s okay babe. what do you say we go out tonight, huh? lemme show you off?” he laughs again when louis lifts his head and beams at him.

“really?”

“really.”

“zayny poo are you exciteeeddd?” louis coos once he’s dressed and ready, swinging his legs from where he’s perched on the bathroom counter. 

zayn looks over at him and blinks. “about what?” 

“it’s our first time going out as a couple, _duh_ ,” louis rolls his eyes dramatically, even though zayn has already gone back to primping himself in the mirror.

“ _oh my god_ , _i’m like_ , _so hot. look at my hair_. _it’s so perfect_. _i’m a god_ ,” louis mocks.

zayn completely ignores him.

louis rolls his eyes, again. 

“ready to go?” zayn asks a few minutes later, when he finally builds up enough willpower to pry himself away from his own reflection. 

louis scoffs. “you say that like you’re the one who’s been waiting on me for the last twenty minutes.” 

zayn gives him a sour look, but follows him out of the bathroom, the hotel room, and then down the hall. 

“are we getting dinner first?” louis asks once they’re in the elevator.

“nah, figure bouncing around at a club on a full stomach isn’t a bright idea. we can order room service when we get back?” zayn offers.

louis considers it for a moment before asking, “do they have chinese?” the elevator pings, signaling they’ve arrived in the lobby.

“i’m sure they do if i ask for it.” zayn shrugs. the elevator doors start to open.

“modest,” louis snorts in mock disgust. he grabs zayn’s hand and puts it on his hip, so he can walk tucked under zayn’s arm. zayn rolls his eyes, but gives louis’ hip a pinch as they exit the elevator. 

zayn is exhausted enough to go back to the hotel by the time they get to the club. he listens to louis babble about how they’re such a cute couple, and all the girls at the club will be jealous, and zayn’s a publicly gay rapper which is like, so cool, and how zayn better hold his hand in the club the whole car ride. every once in a while he nods, and once he even gives a “yeah, lou”.

if anything, babbling has given louis more energy. as soon as they slip in the back door of the club, he’s dragging zayn out to the middle of the floor, shouting something about absolutely loving this song. 

by 2 a.m. louis is grinding against zayn, whispering in his ear how hot it is that everyone in the club knows they’re fucking, and how he wants to go home and get fucked right now. 

zayn is never one to fight louis on anything, so he pinches louis’ ass and guides them towards the back door. 

“gotta fucking piss,” louis grumbles when they stumble into their hotel room.

zayn makes a sound of disgust and pulls louis towards the bed with him. “no. wanna fuck you right now,” he complains when louis tries to make his way towards the bathroom again. 

“gotta pee so bad, babe,” louis looks like he wants to cry. 

zayn shrugs. “piss on me.”

louis seems to momentarily forget about his ready-to-burst bladder, standing at the edge of the bed zayn’s stretched out on with a look of stupor on his face. 

“it’s usually you making with the pissing, and me making with the getting pissed on, buddy,” louis is confused as to why his drunk talk sounds like the human guy from buffy the vampire slayer. maybe zayn’s that vampire who calls everyone pet. human boy and vampire totally had a thing. louis vaguely wonders if he could find porn about that.

louis is brought back to reality, and his need to piss, by zayn’s questioning “buddy?” 

louis rolls his eyes and does a little potty dance. 

“c’mere,” zayn beckons, patting his lap. louis is about to roll his eyes again, but then he notices how deep zayn’s voice has gone. 

louis gulps when he looks up to see zayn biting his lip.

louis waddles over and climbs into zayn’s lap, letting out a little whimper when it jostles his bladder. 

zayn starts to rut up into louis, while using one hand to press on his bladder while the other holds his hip. 

louis’ breath hitches before he whines, “zayn.”

“yeah, baby, let go. want to see you wet yourself,” louis whines again, and his cock is so sore from the strain of holding in his urine he thinks he might cry. 

embarrassment washes over him as he feels the first stream of piss start to spill out of him, but it’s soon replaced with arousal when he hears zayn growl low in his throat. 

it feels so helpless, so vulnerable, pissing himself in zayn’s lap. but zayn is still fucking up against him, grunting and pressing his erection into the flesh of louis’ ass every time he grinds against it. louis is bouncing from it by this time there’s enough piss soaking his jeans to seep into zayn’s too. 

“fuck,” zayn groans, “i don’t know why i was ever the one doing to pissing.” 

louis lets out a breathy laugh at that, but it’s cut short when he feels the steady stream of piss coming from his dick start to seep further towards his hole.

“getting so wet, lou. get yourself wet for me,” one of zayn’s hands slips back to louis’ ass, down until he can press into louis’ crack through his jeans and underwear. 

louis nods frantically, making little keening noises and pressing back at the feeling of his own wet soaking the cloth being pressed against his hole.

finally, after what feels like forever, he can feel the stream starting to slow, until it’s nothing but a trickle.

 

* * *

 

"there’s piss all over the sheets again." 

zayn groans, pulling out of louis and rolling off of him. his head hits the pillow with a thud.

“shit.”

 


End file.
